...and the address continues...
50 Cent - Aaaah, the puppeteer. I think you've efficiently screwed everyone over to the point that NO ONE wants to fuck with you. I don't know how you got Beans on your side (oh wait, yeah I do - that manipulative device called MONEY) but as you can see - the results you were looking for weren't achieved. Jay is way too far gone to give a fuck about your "jabs". Stop pouting about not being a member of the "billionaires" club, you wouldn't look right on Oprah's couch. Your last album TANKED, your latest mix-tapes are "sub-par" at best. Face it - America is done with 50 cent. You tried to keep up with the times, but never quite got back up after that 1-2 punch from Kayne outselling you. Guess he was a bit more arrogant than you were, and you weren't ready. Luckily for you, the same kind of fans that want Nas back on his "Illmatic" shit, are in your corner - hoping one day you'll leave the flashy and flossy lifestyle, and get back on that "Get Rich Or Die Trying" shit. The problem is, that hunger to get out there does not EXIST any longer. The fuck does this nigga have to be hungry for? He's gonna eat for everyday of his life! My advice is this: Cater to your REAL audience, those hungry street niggas who still think hustlin' is cool. Leave the Beamer, Benz & Bentley shit to Banks.
The Game - Game, beef rap is over and you know it. 50 aint worth it. Jay aint worth it. And you worth less than both of 'em. Better get on the "classy-gangsta" boat with Snoop. Flip some Eric B & Rakim, or The Fat Boys and get PAID.
Kanye West - This nigga Kanye is in the same underground bunker they found Hitler in. Goin' in. Waiting for his day to surface and take the game back over...and if he DOESN'T use Auto-Tune, (the 2nd person I've given this advice to) he will. It's been enough time. Honestly, we forgot about Taylor Swift about as quick as we forgot about Haiti. I would say something about that girl of yours, but she's kinda bangin'. Kinda like a Bald-Headed Eagle with a fatty.
CamRon/Dipset - The battle is over. Cam, you won. Jimmy, you tried. Afraid niggas wasn't "Ballin" wit you for long. 50 played you (like he does everyone he wants to use - him and Jay have that "puppeteer" thing in common) and you were left Praying IV Reign. *ahem* (please excuse that bad pun) Jimmy, you were one of the few that actually hopped on the Auto-Tune bus and didn't use it. Ron Browz & Webstar found you in the ocean of Koch (oops, I mean E1) and threw you that lifesaver. Now the Auto-Tune bus is pulling out of the station and it seems like the sea of flopped artists is growing deeper...will you survive the tide? LOL...
Cam, good hustle. You didn't miss a beat - even though you didn't really get much better, either. At least you didn't get worse. I know you had dues to pay, under-produced indie flicks to film and bitches to fuck - but at least you squeezed some decent rhymes in between all of that. I definitely support you and you efforts, Cam.
Juelz, I need you to keep doin' what you do - but just with less intoxication. You got caught up in the middle, but I'm glad you just chose to do you rather than pick sides. I only have one question in all of this, WTF happened to Skull Gang? Cuz, you know. They suck.
Bow-Wow - Not that you are much of a relevant force in this list, but you need to stop making music dude. It's over. Not only are you pissing me off with your attempts at trying to sell a record (I wouldn't even break up weed on New Jack City II) but your last few efforts belong in the bin right next to Yung Berg. You're not little any more, Omarion is IRRELEVANT - your last album TANKED and you ARE Lil' Mama. Maybe you'll get more shine if you interrupt an awards show performance...
Roscoe Dash - Nigga, you sound like a character from a 1990's Saturday morning cartoon on ABC. How did Spike Lee say it? "Coonery and Buffoonery"? Yeah. All the way turnt OFF.
Soulja Boy - See "Roscoe Dash". Actually, no. I've come a long way from hating you (much like I have with Gucci Mane) so honestly - if this is about having fun and getting money, okay. I get it. I'll admit, your approach bothered me at first - but after seeing the business end of things and how you handled your career, I have no choice but to commend you. I honestly didn't think your career would have any longevity after the success of "Crank Dat", but it seems you've set the standard for all sorts of niggerish dances and catchphrases. You've paved the way for iconic singles like "Your A Jerk", "My Dougie" and "O Let's Do It" (note the BLATANT sarcasm) and who could be mad at that? :|
Charles Hamilton - My nigga, please stop using drugs. Please. I cannot have you wandering into my home at 6:50 am any longer. You are a valuable asset to Rap and your flow is UNIQUE - please find you way (the right way) and get back where you should be. You never followed the format, why start now? You stopped making your beats and started rhyming on this industry-packaged shit, and that was the last straw for me. I've gone from looking forward in earnest to your latest projects and adventures to worrying the hell about you, to now just not giving a fuck. You took away the key to that wild mind of yours - your blog - from the public. Bad move. Now that it's gone (it was your life blood even when you were dying), it's become even more difficult for the ones who care to keep up with you. People now exploit you every chance they get (ie: the whole "LadyDoom" fiasco) hoping these wild antics will thrust you back into the mainstream. They will not. For now, I'm sleepin' on Charles Hamilton. Wake me up when the Charles I know is back.